Let me start by saying

Cracklin’ Oat Bran is the greatest cereal ever made. It is created with honey, nuts, magic, oats, magic, and dewdrops from Mount Olympus. It costs more per ounce than launching something into orbit on the space shuttle. Each box contains only one “O” and costs $48,000.00. It was on sale at Von’s. I backed up six tanker trucks and bought 88,198 tons of it. It looks like dog food and tastes like dog food in heaven. I will be buried in a casket made entirely of Cracklin’ Oat Bran. I will float inside on a silky white river of skim milk deliciousness for all eternity.

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